Area man loves bad haircut

Local sceeze-ball Jeremy "J-Will" Wilson loves the new haircut he received at Supercuts this past Saturday.
"It's what the ladies want, so I gots to give the ladies whats they need," said a confused Wilson.
"Corn rows are hot!"
"It looks disgusting," said his oldest babies' mother Summer McBreeze.
" For the love of God, if his rat-tailed hair is so important to him, why doesn't he spend more than $5.99 on it?"
"Girls see a dude in corn rows and think 'damn, that man got style. I want to freak with him all night long,'" explained Wilson.
Current girlfriend Daisy Duke disagrees.
"He looks like a retarded monkey with ADD ... though I guess that's how he usually acts as well."
Wilson, father of five, from four different mothers, says that Duke and McBreeze "just don't get it," and are "playa-haters."
"You don't end up with five kids from four mothers without knowing a thing or two about what the ladies need ... and what they always need is a good sexing."
The mothers of Wilson's other four children could not be reached for comment, but Tits McGee, an ex-girlfriend, would like to know his whereabouts. McGee lent Wilson $1500 in rent money while they were together and he has yet to pay her back.
"My new boyfriend Jamal is going to beat him with a toaster as soon as he gets out of jail."
Wilson seemed unfazed by the brutal appliance beating he is sure to receive.
"Time to test out the new 'due," he exclaimed as he climbed into his 1987 Hyundai.
"The local juniour high is prime meetin' and freakin' ground."