fuck you i won't do what you tell me

Some Photos I Took

What Would David Swick Do?

The Cut of Your Gib is like that of an Asshole Trotskyite

Sooo....i'll be spending the next 4 weeks interning at Shunpiking Magazine. What is this publication I speak of? Only Halifax's premiere Marxist rag, that's all. I acheived this honour at the 11th hour after a long conversation with the publication's Editor in Chief, Tony Seed, who also happens to be the Halifax candidate for the Marxist-Leninist Party.

Back in Van on the 16th...

Smash the State, your Pinko Commie Bastard friend,

Gorms

Area man loves bad haircut

Local sceeze-ball Jeremy "J-Will" Wilson loves the new haircut he received at Supercuts this past Saturday.
"It's what the ladies want, so I gots to give the ladies whats they need," said a confused Wilson.
"Corn rows are hot!"
"It looks disgusting," said his oldest babies' mother Summer McBreeze.
" For the love of God, if his rat-tailed hair is so important to him, why doesn't he spend more than $5.99 on it?"
"Girls see a dude in corn rows and think 'damn, that man got style. I want to freak with him all night long,'" explained Wilson.
Current girlfriend Daisy Duke disagrees.
"He looks like a retarded monkey with ADD ... though I guess that's how he usually acts as well."
Wilson, father of five, from four different mothers, says that Duke and McBreeze "just don't get it," and are "playa-haters."
"You don't end up with five kids from four mothers without knowing a thing or two about what the ladies need ... and what they always need is a good sexing."
The mothers of Wilson's other four children could not be reached for comment, but Tits McGee, an ex-girlfriend, would like to know his whereabouts. McGee lent Wilson $1500 in rent money while they were together and he has yet to pay her back.
"My new boyfriend Jamal is going to beat him with a toaster as soon as he gets out of jail."
Wilson seemed unfazed by the brutal appliance beating he is sure to receive.
"Time to test out the new 'due," he exclaimed as he climbed into his 1987 Hyundai.
"The local juniour high is prime meetin' and freakin' ground."

Kool-Aid arrested, breaks wall

The Kool-Aid Man, known to friends and relatives as Mr. Kool, or just "Kool" to the kids, was arrested today after bursting through a wall into the change rooms at the Halifax Shopping Centre's La Senza.
"Oh yeah," said Kool, pumping his fists in the air, as he poured his fruity blood out over the store's floor.
"He had his little juice box hanging out and he started swinging it around," said one scared over the shoulder, boulder holder shopper.
"It was disgusting."
When police arrived they were offered several different varieties of fruit punch, ranging from Berry Blast to Hawaiian Punch.
After they came down off their sugary buzz, local officers arrested the oversized fish bowl for damage of property and lewd behaviour in a public place.
"Oh yeah," reiterated the accused pervert.
"Oh no," responded Staff Sergeant Eugene Meese.
According to police, Kool claims to have done nothing wrong, but one officer, who refused to go on record, noted "the guy is pretty transparent."
Loud wails could be heard from Kool's jail cell later in the afternoon. Police would not confirm what the noise was, but many felt it was the sound of a washed up 80s promotional icon being beaten with a toaster.

No One Tells a Tricerotops Where He Can't Crap

Edgar, a local Tricerotops, craps in the pot at the University of King's College while reading the Halifax Commoner.

Happy Halloween